Putting on makeup is such a spiritual experience I watch myself go from a 3 to a 9 right in front of my mirror I love it
no, if you are putting on makeup, I don’t care who you are or what you look like, you go from about a 10 to 1
keep talking shit you gonna go from a basic ass 2 to a 6-feet-under
HALLOWEEN IS COMING!
Or, y’know, that thing called “Passover.”
Or the whole thing with Noah’s Ark where he killed off everything in the world except Noah and his family, and two of every animal. Y’know, no big deal. Just millions of people.
90% of the Old Testament is about God killing people in temper tantrums
Are we not going to mention Jesus?
Oh my god.
is michael cera even a real person?
THIS PHOTO WAS TAKEN LAST WEEK AT MY LOCAL KMART. YES, THAT IS A SEALED VHS TAPE OF JIMMY NEUTRON THE MOVIE, IN 2014, AT KMART, SITTING NEXT TO DVDS AND BLU-RAYS, PRICED AT $8.99
To give perspective, this film was released on VHS in 2002 and has been sitting unopened in a Kmart store for 12 years, longer than children now in middle school.
Plain proof that no one does inventory or gives a shit at any Kmart anywhere. Someone could probably live in Kmart and have no one notice.
In 2001, I did an experiment for school about the idea of living in a big-box store like this. I selected a busy 24hr Meijer, which is a midwest-only combination of Marts both K and Wal. I entered the store on a lovely friday afternoon, and didn’t leave the store until the following sunday evening. I read the entire magazine section, played all of the demos of the games in the electronics section, and beat minesweeper on my phone innumerable times. I ate at the pizza parlour they’d just installed, and slept on the display furniture. I wandered around the racks during the day, bored out of my skull. I considered buying frozen burritos and asking one of the employees if they had a breakroom where I could microwave them, but that felt like it wouldn’t truly answer the question if someone could live in a Meijer; I’d be using resources that weren’t public.
The only time I was ever asked if I needed any help was on sunday morning around 8am, and then it was only waking me up to ask me if I was drunk and had wandered in that night and fell asleep on their displays. I said, “no, I’m fine, I’m just trying this futon.” and was left alone.
The people that work there really don’t care.
u lived in a k-mart
This is the most magical thing I’ve ever had the privilege of reading
you deserve a book deal and a movie just for the phrase ‘marts both k and wal’
They used white crayons to draw it, and afterwards they placed ink.